Writing is easy: All you do is sit staring at a blank sheet of paper until drops of blood form on your forehead. -- Gene Fowler

Monday, May 3, 2010

The Mountain of Monday

I'm not sure what to write about today, but it's almost nine o'clock and I'd better get something written. I had a busy week last week and I ended it exhausted but determined to Get Things Done starting today. Last night there were loud, flashy thunderstorms which served to keep me from sleeping properly. I awoke with the memory of a dreamed conversation with my father: "Make sure you remember the address of the lot the house is on." I've been groggy all morning so far, even with tea.

My drive to Get Things Done seems to have faded, drummed out by August-like conditions this weekend and the rhythm of the rain overnight. But Buddha Cat is still looking up toward me. He is relentless and silently demanding, encouraging. So I guess I'd better get started.

I have, among non-writing-related tasks this week, what may amount to an inordinate amount of phone calling to do. It might be that the task looks bigger than it is from where I sit right now: trying to wake up, listening to the sounds of cars driving by on the wet road, drawing some spark from the cool air drifting in the window and the sounds of neighbourhood birds calling outside, feeling the weight of not enough sleep on my brain. I dislike spending long amounts of time on the phone. I have a headset to help me work in the background and prevent arm and ear weariness whilst on hold. But the calls are not something I'm looking forward to today. In fact, I suspect I'm going to drag the writing portion of my morning out to forestall the inevitable slog, the questions and statements and explanations repeated over and over to each new person on the phone who doesn't know I've just told this exact thing to five other people this morning, so forgive me if I'm a little short.

I finally have what I need to continue my work for my business client, too. I've gotten out of the habit of doing that work, so there's another thing to get worked into the day. The paperwork sits, waiting to be assessed and tabulated, in plastic grocery bags on my study floor.

On Friday I was so motivated, feeling so accomplished, ready to take on my obligations head-on. It was a great feeling. True to form, though, it's Monday and weariness and the desire to do things other than what needs done are pulling at me. "Ooh, what's in the email?" my monkey mind asks. "Did you feed the cat?" the Judge demands, narrowing his imagined eyes at me. "Can't we just lay down for a few minutes?" whines the part of me where the tiredness lives.

The email can wait. The cat is fed: if she were hungry she'd come scratching at my door. And no, we can't lay down. There's things to be done today, and they won't do themselves. I'm gonna be busy today. I'll see you all later.

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